Blogs from Milano
Arrival Process and Orientation
The process of traveling to my new home destination for the next few months went smoothly. My route from Norway was way shorter than it usually is to get to New York City which also made the goodbyes with my family easier. I am now finally in the same time zone as them! Milano is also fairly small, so the route from the airport went quickly with a taxi, even though I had some difficulties describing where he had to let me off. In the first couple of weeks, I am living with some of my family friends so the transition from home into a new city has been feeling even safer, as they have welcomed me and showed me around.
As I stated the city is way smaller than I expected. It is divided into circles and with the bike I bought from an old Italian second-hand reseller I can cross the circle in all directions in about 25 minutes. I love the architecture and the smaller and intricate street patterns. It is very fascinating to see the impressive levels of craftsmanship and patience people have put into decorating and carving out symbols and stones on buildings. I also appreciate the many outdoor seating areas, or maybe the many random places where people sit down to enjoy the sun or even just the company of other strangers around them. While the idea of a slow living or dolce vita is extremely present, the hustle and bustle is more than I expected it to be. It is sort of the traditional Italian village merged with inputs from Switzerland and Berlin. But from my impressions, that is essentially because it is more industrial and fashion-oriented. I have however concentrated more on the slow living part, joining in on aperetivos and taking the time to enjoy a cup of coffee and people-watching. Through the people watching I have also learned quite a lot about cultural differences. Italians are very open with their feelings. Not necessarily in the way of talking about them but through body language. It is of course a stereotype that they have a lot of hand movements, but the amount of people crying openly on the street or kissing very excessively has been more than expected. While there is a limit to what the public can tolerate, I admire their ways of feeling open and emotional.
After some slow days trying to explore the area, walking through small streets and window shopping in the artsy area of Brera I started the orientation program for exchange students. It started with an opening meeting with an introduction to the services of the school and associations and sports activities we could connect with. We also had a treasure hunt where I got my first friends. A Swedish guy and a girl from Canada. You fully have to push yourself out of your comfort zone to get to know new people. I especially feel like that is hard and tiring, as I have been through the process of ‘moving to a new place and having to make new friends again’ several times. I however kept in contact with them and met up with some of their friends later that day to join them on a bowling night arranged by the Erasmus Student Network association. This was a good place to get to know more people. The new interactions also led to a trip to Genova on the Sunday before classes started. The trip kickstarted this semester and got me excited about how short the distance in this country and the many opportunities there are to explore other parts of Italy and Europe. The semester is starting off strong and I am excited for what the next weeks will bring.
Housing Process
While the process of arriving in Milan went extremely well, I can not say the same for the housing process. It was rather time-consuming and hard. It would have been good to have a place settled before I came down here, but that was not the case. I had heard from other people in Milan that being scammed by websites and people renting out apartments and rooms was very common. I was also not familiar with the city itself, the neighborhoods, the distances…I, therefore, decided to get to the city first and then explore and find something. I was however lucky enough to stay with some family friends for the first two weeks to get settled in and find a place to live. I searched on several websites like HousingAnywhere, DoveVivo, and SpotaHome, all websites connected with the School. I had some luck finding rooms, but they were tiny, and in areas very far away from the school. I, however, came by a Facebook post in one of the school’s groups, where two Swedish girls searched for a third roommate, in a cozy little apartment only 10 minutes away from campus. I had to reach out and even ask them out for a coffee. They were really interested, and I will be moving in with them at the end of February. This was also another incident where I had to step out of my comfort zone and practice promoting myself.
My monthly rent for the apartment is around 650 euros which is far less than what I pay in NYC. But there are generally higher prices all over the USA compared to here which is relieving. However, the housing process in the USA is far more simple than here. Italians are taking their time with contracts and handing over keys. I however think this is connected with their concept of slow living and limiting stress. This from the renters' perspective can be a little annoying and terrifying. Living in the stress of not knowing if this is actually legit and when and where to move in and getting things settled. The main difference probably lies in efficiency, but I think that is something that you need to get used to here in Italy.
I have only visited the apartment once because I will be moving in soon. I however love the simplicity of the furniture and the general vibe. We also have two balconies with views into this cute traditional backyard. It is exactly the vibe that I was looking for with cute window shields in different colors, and narrow stairs. It also has a washing machine which is not so normal to have inside your house here. The apartment is looking great so far and I am excited to get to know my roommates more and finally settle properly in.
Cuisine
Italian cuisine has always been one of my favorites and so far Milan has not disappointed me. However, the meals all tend to be quite filling. Therefore I usually always start my day with yogurt and fruit. Here in Italy, only a croissant and a coffee is good enough. I have tried several different focaccia types because the type of bread comes from this area. They fill it with all types of ham and cheese, pecorino, parmesan, burrata, and prosciutto. This is usually what I do for lunch and perhaps an espresso. For dinner I have tried several different things, both delicious pizzas with truffle and zucchini or pasta. I have now tried risottos with Safran and gnocchi with pesto and Milanese veal. These are all very traditional dishes from this area of Italy. It was my first time trying the veal, but it reminded me of something from Switzerland or Germany. You only have the veal covering your whole plate, and then you can order tomatoes and potatoes on the side. It is very filling, but something I definitely had to try. Most of the other food I have had, I have tried before—different pasta dishes and ravioli. They also love dessert here, which is perfect. Tiramisu is my favorite, but I have tried several different dishes with pistachios. Italians love nuts and pistachio creams are very prevalent.
In comparison to the USA, I would say the cuisine is quite similar, especially in NYC. It is an overwhelming amount of Italian pizza stores or even restaurants, so I usually eat a lot of Italian food in NYC as well. However, it has been interesting to get more into their eating schedule, because it is very different than I am used to. Usually, Italians start their day very early only with a coffee. During the morning cappuccinos are allowed, however as lunch is approaching you have to take your coffee without milk. For lunch the amount of food usually varies, some people sit down at restaurants to order proper meals, while others just pick something up. Before dinner, it is very common to have apperetivo, which is a drink with snacks on the side, like chips, olives, and prosciutto around 6 pm. After this drink then you finally head to a restaurant. Most restaurants here have two seatings, one at 7 pm and one at 9 pm. Eating at 9 pm is very late for my taste, but it is how the culture is here. However, I get why they have this schedule and eat little and mostly during dinner. Italian food is very filling, and I do not think you will be able to eat all three full meals without feeling packed. So far the cuisine here has been a hit, and I am looking forward to exploring more local dishes from the area.
Academics and Campus Life
I tried to minimize the workload here in Milan, so I have only gone with four fun classes. Currently, I am enrolled in Regenerative Urban Design, Project Management, Biomedical Ethics, and Diversity Design. These have all proved to be very interesting classes. Especially the Regenerative Urban Design class has been very fascinating. I am working in a team with only Italians and two French students creating a project regenerating an abandoned railway yard, Porta Genova. This is a real project not yet realized but in the ideation process by the Italian Government as well. We are gathering so much information and learning about the planning process within Italy. It is such a great way to get more into the culture of Italy especially as all the group members are Italians. My teacher is also such a classic Italian old woman, which just adds another dimension to how the classroom atmosphere is. This is the most encapsulation and creative experience I have had so far. I am very excited to participate in this as it is so real and present. The project also becomes even more fascinating as we are getting critics from civil engineering, urban planning, and architecture companies in Italy to review our proposals. This is probably the biggest project I have during this semester, however they have some form of project work in all classes. This part is quite similar to how classes in NYC work. Project work and presentations seem to be more valuable, especially within the areas I am studying. However, the main difference is more in the importance of showing up. Classes are not as mandatory as they are in the US, and it is very common to have overlapping classes that you might never show up to and only be enrolled in.
I am so happy I have a project with Italians because I can fully understand more of their classroom and study culture. The atmosphere around the school is so different compared to the US. Smoking and drinking during lunch are common, and having an espresso break in the middle of class is just normal. Even though it might seem relaxed they are very focused and participative in class. However I love the more relaxed incorporation of social life and school, it generates a very welcoming and inviting atmosphere.
So far I have yet to participate in some extracurricular activities. The activities that have been are usually done by the Erasmus Organization or individual students. There is more of a culture of creating and inviting people by yourself rather than the school or local community creating opportunities. It is my impression that they value individuality and freedom, and also explains the limited organizational activities, but rather giving those chances to the students themselves.
Cost of Living
A typical day usually varies depending on whether it is a weekday or weekend. However, during school days I usually wake up at around 7 or 8 am. When it is time to have breakfast I have the same thing every day, yogurt with granola and berries, and other fruit. It is super light and fresh and starts my mornings off perfectly. At this point in the season, it is starting to feel a lot more summery so I can finally put on summer clothes. While I sometimes walk those 12 minutes to school riding my bike is what I do the most often. I have my first class starting at 8.30 lasting two hours. I usually have long breaks between classes so sometimes I go back home to finish up some work and make lunch with food at home or I go out with friends or by myself for lunch. I usually tend to make meals myself but treat myself more than often to meals outside as well, so that I have the opportunity to try the different foods Italy has to offer. I then head back to school, after lunch I typically tend to have really long lectures, like 4 or 6 hours, so it is important to bring snacks. Usually, I end up buying a cornetto or croissant and an espresso at the school cafes.
When I am done I usually stop by the grocery store to pick up some fresh meat and vegetables for dinner. Everything is so fresh in the grocery stores so I need to almost by vegetables on a daily basis because they are so organic and get bad very easily. However in the grocery store, it is very easy to get tempted, they have so much fresh pasta, bread, and prosciutto that always caught my eye. All these ingredients that I like to think are kind of expensive, especially in the US and Norway have way better prices here, for me it sometimes feels unreal. I always get pleasantly surprised when I have to check out. However, even though the prices are good, there is way less variety in the things they sell. If you want to make a meal inspired by a different cuisine, it is almost impossible to find the things you need. Nevertheless, I am here for their cuisine so I am not complaining. They also have limited self-checkouts here, and you always have to speak to cashiers. However, I have learned the basic words for bag and change and some numbers so that seems to be going well. When I am home I usually make dinner for myself and sometimes all the roommates eat dinner together. While it depends on the day I either finish up some work before going to bed or I go out with some friends for an apperetivo. Especially as the weather and temperatures are getting better I think I will do that more often.
Honestly, the best way to navigate the city is to be good at exploring. The structure of the city is impossible to fully comprehend as there are so many small roads and places you might never get to see. However, spending time exploring with a bike and just simply walking around really gets you to understand how some of the main roads and landmarks connect. I personally use a lot of TikTok to get restaurants and itineraries, they tend to outline good places to eat or good deals on special days for example. Since I did not have a place to stay at the beginning my dad really pushed me to see different areas to get a sense of good neighborhoods and places you might want to stay away from. This exploration is something I would advise everyone to do at the beginning especially.
Meeting New People
Since I have moved around in so many places I have been through the process of making new friends several times. Even though I find it amusing and fun to delve into the field of new friendships all over again it can also sometimes be very draining, especially at the beginning of a new place. Because you first have to settle in and experience the environment a bit by yourself to find comfort and stability, however, there also is a need to constantly push yourself out there to try to talk to as many people as possible at the beginning. In the beginning, more people are eager to talk and more welcoming and open to new connections. Therefore the need to find a balance can be difficult, and probably the thing I struggled the most with when opening up myself and allowing for new friendships to be made. However, there were several events and opportunities at the beginning to make new connections. Bowling nights and apperetivos arranged by the school or other associations connected with the school. These really helped me meet so many new people. I would say that most of my friends here are from those events. However, I also found myself very drawn to people from similar cultures to mine, especially as there are so many Scandinavians here. I also had a lot of people I knew here before, from my boarding school in Canada. This was very interesting to me, especially as I have always longed for people who were different from me, from different countries and cultures than mine. However I kind of see how it correlates with the ‘problem’ I stated previously, about finding a sense of comfort and stability. It is very easy or at least easier to connect to people that are more similar to you, especially in the beginning when everything else is so different. While I see myself with a lot of Swedish friends and even Swedish roommates I am very aware of the reason I spend time with them. Therefore I have also pushed myself as I got more familiar with the place and surroundings to explore different friendships with people from classes, especially those with a lot of Italians in them. So now, as I am growing and finding my own space I have also had time to create so many friendships with people all around the world.
I think one of the most memorable connections has been with many of the Italians. They are so open and welcoming to everyone. Even though I had only met them for one class, they invited me out for a coffee. I often find that Americans behave the same way, however, they do not always keep to their word when making arrangements. You get an invite and when trying to follow up on it, it is suddenly not so important anymore. Italians keep me notified and always remind me of the meetup. I find it very interesting to see how people open up and allow new connections to be made because it always varies and depends on the culture and country you are in. This is also such a good way to observe the differences in people. As I said I have been to so many places where I am required to make new friends and it teaches me so much about the atmosphere and the culture of places. I think that is very interesting to keep in mind when formulating how I look at the world and connections made in the future.
Extra Curricular
In terms of academic activities the main activity I have done has been in connection to one of my classes. While we in that class work on a project management plan we have been offered to participate with one of the tutors in collecting some research for him. It has been very lowkey at this point, only collecting information about some of the LEED-certified buildings in Milano. However, it is very interesting learning from someone in the field and understanding how some of the processes take place, especially in a different country, it is also fascinating how it can be so time-consuming. However, I am engaging with a lot of other students mostly from Italy helping me get a sense of their work ethic and perspectives.
I have also joined in on several of the ESN, or Erasmus student Network activities that have been organized on campus. These all vary in activity, I however joined them on their ski trip to the Alps and several of the events they have hosted in the city, like the city tour and bowling night. This has been a place to get to know more people which has been very beneficial when moving into a different environment. Apart from the organized events I have also engaged in a lot of cultural activities here in Italy. It was recently Easter, and Italy has a religious culture. I spent my Easter down in a little town by the coast, Nervi. They had a big fire filled with palms representing the death and reincarnation of Jesus Christ. Everyone in the little town was gathered around the fire while they held a concert and served food from stalls around the area. Everyone was dancing and it was interesting to see how freeing it felt for them, even the old people stood up and participated. I felt like it shows how connected Italians feel to each other and how strong the national pride is.
Apart from that I also take the time to see several of the cultural sites all over Italy. Usually in the small towns I visit I take the time to visit churches. However, in Milan, I have explored several of their museums. Obviously, I have seen the Duomo, but also the Leonardo da Vinci Museum, Prada Fondazione, Castello, and some of the smaller galleries around the city. I never really plan to visit these sites, but it comes spontaneously if I am exploring neighborhoods. When I am exploring I love being spontaneous. I bring my book and take the day as it comes. I have gotten more into reading being here as well. Sit down in beautiful small hidden courtyards and people watch while reading.
Culture and Identity
Even though the main language in Italy is Italian, most people in Milan are fluent in English. That put a little hold on my journey to actually learning the language. However, I get myself understood if there is a barrier, this is mostly because of the excessive body language that the Italians have. It is so fascinating how well they can describe their feelings even without using their voice, this makes every interaction a lot easier in every way. That is probably the main difference between NYC and Italy and especially Norway. Additionally, it took time to get used to WhatsApp, they are obsessed with this app and do not use any other app apart from this one. However, it is all about patience and respect when emerging yourself into a new language and the rules of communicating.
In my previous blog post, I also mentioned some of the religious practices or traditions they have here in Italy. While most of Milan is rather atheist, there are of course obvious signs of religion. So many churches with ceremonies every Sunday. Additionally, both Easter and Christmas are very well celebrated. The school was out most of those holy days. I participated in one Sunday gathering in a little church outside of Milan, we had a communion and sermon. It was interesting how prevalent religion is shown within the city, however, I feel like the bigger cities are slowly moving away from it, especially the younger generations. Most of my Italian friends are not religious, while their grandmother is very religious. I feel like that's the most common scenario in Italy nowadays.
I have not observed that many cultural norms this far. However, you are expected to wear something covering when going to church. The way you order food is also very different from what it is in NYC. The trust cafes have in their customers is fantastic. My first time ordering coffee I tried to pay right after, but I was given bad looks and the waiter told me to pay when I finished. Some of these norms I also learned through most of my Italian friends. These have also helped me engage more with the local community. In addition to the norms, they have also given me lists of places they recommend. These places are where most of the locals go, and I think it is the best way to actually experience what a ‘normal’ Italian does. Through conversations with them, it has also given me a sense of how close they are with family. This has allowed me to see the city through a different lens, and perhaps not the glorified lens of a tourist.
Trip
I have been on several small trips this semester. Some are like day trips while others are longer. The best has been to Lake Como. I had never been there before and something that I had planned on doing even before I came to Milan. I had seen the colorful small buildings and it being so close to the mountains. I therefore planned on going there while my sister and her friend came to visit me. We went on a Saturday so the train ride was insanely full, however when we got to see through the window it was such a wonderful view. Being close to water is always such a wonderful feeling, and the air was so crisp while it was still a good temperature. We could look up to the Alps and even spot the snow on top of the mountains. The favorite thing we did was just to stroll around underneath beautiful flowers and enjoy delicious gelato.
While the trip was amazing we also encountered some challenges. As I said the train was extremely crowded, we had to stand crushed between people in an area with no seats. It was so warm and moist almost, so we struggled not to catch a headache. We also missed our train back because of the delay. However, an hour later we got on our way back home. With both of these challenges, we had to remain patient and stay calm. It is very easy to get jammed up, but we had each other to make it more fun rather than exhausting. It was wonderful getting out of the city and closer to nature. I think that is the most important thing I learned. Sometimes I get too fixated on making the most of Milan the city, however, it is important to see everything around it. I am in fact here to experience Italy as a whole.
While this trip was a different location it also reminded me of the other day trips I have taken this semester. To Genova, Portofino, Bologna. They all have these classic houses and small holes for cafes. However, Lake Como is even closer, only a 40-minute train ride. It is a must-see and gives you a good introduction to what Northern Italy has to offer. The villages are so small and so close to each other, so there are unlimited places to explore. It is also fantastic to take boat trips between the different towns around the lake. The food is super good and being so close to nature brings perspective.
Free Post
Learning a new language was one of my goals when arriving at my study-abroad location. The process of learning Italian has been a lot harder than I expected. I was very determined initially and excited to put myself through this process. I had already started my Duolingo streak a couple of months before. I learned simple phrases and some simple words just to be able to get around and be able to order a couple of things at cafes and restaurants. However, when I finally got to Milan I was taken by surprise. Everyone spoke English. They obviously also talked in Italian, but most Italians were unwilling to talk to me in Italian, even though I would start ordering in Italian. I would ask for ‘un caffe macchiato per favore’ but my response would be ‘That will be 1.20 euros, are you sitting here or for take away’. I was confused and demotivated. However, I realized that I did not look particularly Italian, and perhaps that's why they always treated me like a tourist lost in the Italian language. I suddenly lost most of my motivation, my Duolingo streak ended and I would not even be bothered to order in Italian anymore.
Since this was supposed to be my SMARTER goal I also had a long conversation with Andrew Parr about my issue. While I discovered that my goal had been a failure through our conversation I understood that maybe my goal in being in Milan was not necessarily to learn the place's language, but rather assimilating myself into the culture and the idea of being a local. Learning the language would only be the cherry on top, the main idea is to get to understand the area through the perspective of someone who lives here. The neighborhoods and the restaurants they prefer. What they do on a normal day, what they would order. I was afraid to look like a tourist and blinded by the fact that learning the language would be the way out.
Final Reflection
Being abroad and being back in Europe has been good for me. I have been able to find my zen and I am so thankful for this relaxing and adventurous half year abroad. I have learned so much about myself and my perspectives and outlook on the world. Participating in another culture and looking to blend in with locals has turned out to be hard yet I have gained a better understanding of my aspirations and goals and how those will change and differ as I go along with new experiences, trips, and connections. While I have been abroad so many times before, this time it felt different, I was faced with the concept of ‘making the most of your time’. Since the stay was so short I had to push myself out of my comfort zone constantly to connect with as many people as possible, go on as many trips, and eat and experience as much of the culture as I possibly could.
The first thing I realized when I came to Italy and the main takeaway from this culture and country is their idea of ‘la dolce vita’. They are so relaxed and patient. This is something that is seen firstly in the many delayed trains and queues. Italians love waiting for coffee, food, and flowers. There is absolutely no need to stress about anything. This idea also grows further into the need to eat out, drink, and partying as well. There is not necessarily a divide between weekdays and weekends. Eating late dinner, going out to bars, or even drinking can happen any day of the week, even at school. This is something that I am not used to at all in Norway or the US. However it takes off the pressure of making the most of the weekend cause those things can also be done during the week, and there is no need to take it full out either because you can enjoy every day. Children and old people are out any time of the day. This has helped me relieve so much stress and I have been able to make more of every day.
Emotions are also a big part of this country. There is a lot of public display of emotions, affection, and body language. One of my main stereotypes about coming to Italy was the excessive body language and gestures, especially with their hands. However, when trying to learn a language or even the communication style and settings this type of language is very beneficial and has helped me understand when language barriers are present. I have gained good communication skills. Additionally, some of the other skills have been control and time management. Structuring my days, project work, classes, chores, friendships, and trips. Patience has also been one of the biggest skills in dealing with language barriers and a relaxed lifestyle. All in all, it has pushed me out of my comfort zone in many ways.
Here in Italy, I have had so much more time actually taking part in projects that mirror an actual experience of what different occupations look like, and specifically different jobs in my field of Urban planning and project management feel and look like. The many projects and focuses during classes have given me a clearer look at what I want to focus on in my career and what parts of those projects I find inspiring. I loved creating a real-life project management plan with the help of a real-life project manager, as well as a full report on a regeneration project with visits from professional architects, urban planners, and people from great companies like the Arup sustainability department. Having these projects being so similar to how it actually is made it a lot clearer to me and easier to navigate between the many opportunities out there.
The part of this half year that made it the most inspirational and fun was the many trips I took from Milan. It is so close to many great adventures and day trips. Lake Como, Verona, Venice, torino, bologna, bergamo, portofino, cinque terre and genova. These trips I will always remember along with the delicious food I had from each of the places. There is something about planning out trips by yourself or with friends, there is a certain expectation and excitement towards how it will be. All my trips have been filled with wonderful adventures, hikes to the clear blue ocean, small villages, and insane nature. They always leave me with a new perspective and I am usually reflecting when taking the trains back home. The trips have turned out to be small glimpses into another life and reflection on how it would be to live there. I will always remember these as it sums up the freeing feeling of living in Italy and Milan.
If I could have repeated my semester abroad I would have gone on even more trips and participated in even more events happening. I found it hard at the beginning to balance all the things I needed to do. I was eager to see and explore but also kept back by schoolwork or the feeling of things feeling too much out of my comfort zone. I wished I got to know even more people and that I was better at keeping up the contact with some of them. Additionally, I also wished I did not care that much about all the work I had to do. While in some classes I was really exited and wanted to work and make it as great as possible, in other classes I probably could have been a bit more relaxed. This could have given me even more time to see the things I wanted to see.
Being in Milan and many areas in Italy I have really fallen in love with Europe, and I can see myself going back. And for those that will go to Milan, I have a lot of advice for you. Firstly the most important is to stay open-minded and allow yourself to feel uncomfortable in situations that will feel new to you. Usually, you will find so much power and strength when completing something that you think is scary. Push yourself to try as much as possible in the beginning. It will feel tiring but it will allow you to find what you like and enjoy. Coming to a new place might also feel very overwhelming, however, set up lists beforehand of things you can get recommended and things you want to experience. The only way to make yourself comfortable with your surroundings is to explore and to walk around, however, knowing of some spaces beforehand, might make it feel less overstimulating. Take as many trips as possible, it allows you to see a lot of the culture and how different people behave and act, and it will make you feel more assimilated into the country. Milan has been wonderful and has made me grow in so many ways.